How coaching helped me see things differently
End of December Reflections: My Experience Working with a Coach
The last weekend of December 2024 is here. This is the perfect time for reflection as I sip coffee in one of my favorite coffee houses (which, by the way, is beautifully decorated for the holiday season)
There’s something about cafés that often makes them my favorite place to write. Sure, they’re noisy, and people speak loudly (particularly here in Spain, we Spaniards are loud!).
When I compare writing a blog post here with doing the same in an Espresso House in Stockholm, the contrast is night and day. Stockholm's vibe is silent and cozier, with a charming mix of mismatched furniture, vintage lamps, and eclectic ceramics. Everything is different, yet it blends together so stylishly and is quieter, too (Swedes speak more softly!)
That said, the lively noise around me here becomes a kind of background “white noise” that I quickly get used to. It even puts me in “writing mode.” So, here we go with my final blog post for 2024.
Looking back instead of ahead
In previous years, I used this time to try and “predict” what might happen in the year to come. But honestly, this year, it feels impossible. The boom in AI, especially in language AI, is moving so fast that any prediction I make will become outdated almost immediately. So, instead of looking ahead, I want to reflect on something I did for the first time this year, something I had resisted for a while but finally decided to try: working with a coach.
Why I decided to work with a coach
The idea of hiring a coach had been in the back of my mind for a while. Still, for various reasons, I hadn’t acted on it. Those reasons ranged from arrogance: “Why would I need a coach after nearly three decades in the industry?”, to insecurity: “What will the coach think if I don’t know the answer to a question or if I’ve got the wrong perspective?”
It’s funny how conflicting emotions can coexist about the same thing. But let’s cut to the chase: this year, I decided to go for it and start working with a coach!
In the following paragraphs, I’ll share the key takeaways and lessons from my coaching experience.
Finding the right coach
The first thing I learned is that finding a coach is more complicated than it seems.
How do you find a coach who’s a good match for you?
What’s the “Tinder” of coaching?
There are countless platforms and endless possibilities on LinkedIn for connecting with professionals. For me, after an analysis that took longer than I’d like (procrastination disguised as “searching for the perfect coach”), I finally landed on a platform called BetterUp.
What I liked about BetterUp was its variety of options: career coaching, communication coaching, personal coaching, and more. They also offer a quiz to match you with potential coaches based on your preferences. The quiz felt insightful and relevant. I could also filter coaches based on availability and time zone, which was important since I wanted to schedule my sessions on Tuesdays at 6:30 p.m., after my regular workday.
That’s how I found my coach, a kind and empathetic person originally from Nigeria, now based in the UK. His personal story resonated with me, a self-made individual who achieved success through hard work and determination. It was truly inspiring.
His coaching style also put me at ease, as I had been nervous about being judged.
I’m allergic to “Why did you do that?” type questions. Instead, his approach was rooted in curiosity (it reminds me of Ted Lasso’s philosophy: “Be curious, not judgmental.” It's a great TV show, btw, by the way. Give it a chance if you haven't watched it yet!)
One session about that mindset of “be curious, not judgemental” stood out when we were discussing decision-making. He asked me a challenging question: “If this were your company, built with your personal financial investment, would you make the same decision?”
That question hit me hard and forced me to confront truths I’d been avoiding.
That’s the value of coaching; it brings awareness to areas of your personality or leadership style one might prefer to ignore.
How coaching sessions worked
The sessions were dynamic. I could choose between 30- or 60-minute sessions at various slots. I started with weekly 60-minute sessions but eventually switched to 30 minutes. An hour was mentally and physically draining; I’d often end a session sweating, literally! Thirty minutes worked better for me, allowing me to focus on one topic and complete weekly assignments more effectively.
The sessions themselves were incredibly useful, but the real impact came from reflecting on and working through the assignments afterward during the week. Initially, sessions covered a mix of topics to build trust. Later, they became more focused. My coach would ask, “Miguel, is there anything from last week you’d like to explore further?” He also sent follow-up articles and thought-provoking questions after each session, which often left me with more questions than answers. This made follow-up sessions even more productive.
My 3 Key Takeaways
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Beyond the revelation of blind spots and gaining self-awareness in areas I preferred to ignore, there are three main lessons that these coaching sessions helped me with, lessons that I feel are essential for my professional development:
1. Clarity to see the bigger picture
One of the most important lessons I’ve learned through coaching is that it’s hard to see the whole picture when you’re in the middle of it. As a Localization team leader, we often face complicated decisions and challenges. A coach acts like a mirror, helping me see my strengths, weaknesses, and areas for improvement.
Coaching helped me discover strengths I didn’t fully appreciate and weaknesses I didn’t realize were holding me back. This helped me learn to make better decisions because my coach asked me questions that helped me understand tough problems and take clear, practical steps to solve them.
2. Accountability for staying on track
Setting big goals is easy, but staying focused on them is much harder. It’s easy to fool yourself, but fooling a coach is much more difficult 😊
Every session ended with specific actions I needed to take. Knowing I had to report back gave me extra motivation to follow through. Ultimately, it’s much harder to avoid your responsibilities or skip tasks you know you need to do when a coach tracks your progress.
3. Work-life balance to finding a sustainable rhythm
Leadership can feel lonely and exhausting. I often refer to this as “the loneliness of leadership.” When you’re a middle manager, there are things you simply can’t discuss with your team or direct reports, no matter how good your relationship with them is. The same goes for your boss; even if you have a great boss, opening up to them about certain topics isn’t always easy. Those situations can be difficult, and this was another major takeaway for me while working with my coach.
The stress of managing teams, making decisions, and delivering results can drain my energy. Coaching taught me how to find balance and keep going in a sustainable way.
Final Thoughts
Working regularly with a coach is helping me become a better leader by improving my clarity, accountability, and work-life balance. It’s also been a humbling experience. Through difficult questions, coaching has forced me to confront situations I’d rather ignore. Perhaps that’s another takeaway: a coach helps you stay grounded.
What about you? Have you worked with a coach or considered it? I’d love to hear your thoughts!
@yolocalizo
Working with a coach has helped me see the bigger picture, stay focused, and find balance as a leader. I’ve discovered strengths I didn’t fully appreciate, faced blind spots I used to avoid, and learned how to manage stress while staying (kind of) on track with my goals. This post covers all that!